Outnumbered

Today was my 20 week ultrasound. It’s almost impossible to believe that I’m half-way through this adventure. The first 12 weeks of my pregnancy were probably the longest in my life, but the last 2 months have flown by.

I’ve been a bit nervous about this exam because my second trimester blood tests weren’t quite what my OB was expecting. The awful part about these routine tests is that they are for screening and not diagnosis. In other words, they tell you what the odds  are that the baby has a particular problem instead of offering a definitive answer. And as it turned out, my odds of having a baby with Trisomy 18 (a condition involving extra chromosomes) were 1:130. The odds of a typical 34 year old having a baby with this disorder are 1:1000, which means I was at elevated risk. But oddly, I was not at high enough risk for the screening test to be considered positive. So when the lab initially called me with the results they merely said “Congratulations, your screening test was negative!” I didn’t know my actual odds until I went to see my doctor 3 weeks ago and she said “Well yes, the results were **technically** negative, but they’re higher than I would expect. So you should see a perinatologist for your 20 week ultrasound just so we can have an expert take a good look at things. But don’t panic! I’m sure everything is fine”.

Yeah, don’t panic. Right. Got it.

Of COURSE I panicked. After several years of crappy odds, what was going to make me think that this time the odds were truly in my favor? So the first thing that I did was bust out a calculator and divide 1 by 130. It gave me a readout with a big E and lots of other numbers, which I deciphered to mean approximately .7%. OK, I thought. That’s truly minor. BUT. What if I DO fall in that .7%? What is Trisomy 18 anyway? So I jumped on the internet and what I found was not reassuring. Most babies that have Trisomy 18 either die before or right after birth. My anxiety was reaching a fever pitch.

That’s when Jim stepped in and talked me off the edge. He asked if I would take 99.3% odds in Vegas. And of course, I would. Who wouldn’t? Then he assured me that things would be fine. I knew there were no guarantees, but it made me feel better to hear him say it. I proceeded to tell my close friends, and they were also very reassuring. And somehow I trusted them a lot more than my doctor. Don’t get me wrong—I’ve still had plenty of “what if” worst-case-scenario moments in the past few weeks, but I have definitely managed to maintain a higher degree of sanity than I thought possible.

I was shaking a bit when we went in for the ultrasound. I think it was mostly having to do with the smoothie I drank beforehand, but my nerves weren’t helping. I could feel my heart pounding when the technician started the exam, but luckily she zeroed in on the baby right away and I could see he was alive and kicking. That’s right: he. We found out about halfway through the ultrasound that we’ll be having a boy. The 13th boy in a row for Jim’s side of the family and the 5th boy in our household (if ya count Jim, Banjo, Rooster, and The Beast).

The perinatologist came in after the nurse had taken the measurements and did a little ultrasounding of her own. She confirmed that everything looks on target and that not only are we having a boy, but a boy that appears to be perfectly healthy. I felt like a  Powerball winner. Totally amazed and overwhelmed. And thrilled to have the opportunity to be be wildly outnumbered. Bring it on, team blue.

Seriously, again?

Yet another odd animal pairing in an Asian country. The picture is super-duper cute though.

My new favorite web site

I can’t believe how fabulous this is. I had to buy an early birthday present for myself.

Less is more

A couple of weeks ago we finally decided to hit the streets in search of a new couch for our office. Our old one was pretty scratched up (thanks to Beast’s handiwork) and didn’t go with the new desk furniture we bought when we moved into our house a year and a half ago. Now, Jim isn’t one who likes to spend a lot of money on furniture. And I’m not one who’s willing to settle. And we both have strong opinions about how things should look—in this case, modern but not TOO modern. So I knew we were up for a challenge.

We started off at Crate and Barrel, and although there were a couple of options that I liked aesthetically, Jim didn’t think they were comfortable enough. And he ruled out a few options based on price. So we headed off to Sofa Mart, just to check it out. I figured it was a long shot since they don’t typically carry modern-looking furniture. And of course we couldn’t find anything that worked—all the styles were too traditional or fancy pants. And that’s when I started to get a little irritated.

I just don’t understand why furniture with simple, clean lines is so damn expensive. Wouldn’t it be easier and thus cheaper to make something without frou-frou details? I can’t remember who coined the adage “less is more” but I’m positive they weren’t talking about price. However, that’s the way things generally pan out. Granted, Target has done a fabulous job recently of selling well designed furniture and home accessories for reasonable prices. But you definitely sacrifice a level of quality, and they don’t sell couches (at least not in their stores, and I’m not going to buy a couch I haven’t sat on). I just don’t understand why other discount retailers (hello, Sofa Mart!) can’t do the same thing. Just hire a couple of decent furniture designers and go to it. It’s not rocket science.

But it seems in practice that “less” is usually more in every sense of the word. Ever looked at a Design Within Reach catalog? I find the name of the store hilarious because it’s not even CLOSE to being within reach for most people. So I like to call it “Design Not Within YOUR Reach”. I mean, I get that they sell furniture designed or inspired by famous designers and yes, these items would typically be more expensive if you were to go out and try to buy an original Eames chair, for example. But who does that? I guess people with really long arms.

Anyway, we eventually ended up at Room and Board. I was worried the prices would be out of our comfort zone. But luckily I was wrong. It didn’t take us long to find a couch we loved, and while it wasn’t cheap, it was actually less expensive than some of the choices at Crate and Barrel. And it was in stock, which was even better. It was delivered last Friday, and we love it.

Now we just need to repaint the office since it’s a horrible shade of red that was recommended by an interior designer who clearly didn’t know what she was doing. That’s next weekend’s project, and I know Jim can’t wait. Ha! This will be the second room in the house we’ve had to completely repaint. You’d think an architect and a graphic designer could figure out colors, but it’s clearly not that easy. I guess in our case more is more. More paint, more time, more opportunities to bitch about the perils of home improvement.

Shock and awe

We finally decided to take the plunge and hire a trainer for the dogs. Or rather, I decided to hire a trainer and then convinced Jim to go along with it. Things have gotten markedly more hectic around here since Rooster joined the roost, so I thought we’d better do something about it before the baby arrives and life REALLY gets crazy. After a little research I opted to go with Bark Busters. The fee is quite steep, but they have a lifetime guarantee and the trainer, Katrina, came highly recommended.

Our first session was yesterday morning and it was a revelation. Jim and I learned about the **many** things we have been doing wrong, and Katrina taught us how to correct our  approach and hone our alpha dog skills. It turns out that I need to be more firm. Big surprise. It also turns out that Banjo is quite stubborn, though with a fair amount of repetition he did start to get it. By the end of the 2.5 hour session the dogs were actually falling in line. Relatively speaking. It will take a lot of daily practice, but I’m confident that we can make some positive changes around here.

One of the methods we were taught to employ involves uttering a low growl. Unfortunately I’ve had to do quite a bit of growling in the last 24 hours and I’m starting to get hoarse. I wonder if perhaps I just need to train my growling muscles, or if I’m destined to have an itchy throat for the next few weeks until the boys start toeing the line. With their itty bitty toes.

Since we need to teach the dogs’ their “place”, we decided it’s time to kick them out of our bed. So we went out yesterday and bought a super cushy dog bed that both pooches can share. And for the most part, they took to it like ducks to water. Of course, they TRIED to jump up onto our bed at first, but I employed my best growl and then led them back to the dog bed. And they curled right up. And I almost died of shock.

Jim is equally impressed by the results, but I think he’s a little saddened by some of the developments. We’re supposed to keep the dogs off of the couch for a while to teach them they can’t come up until invited. This is a bit of a sticking point. You see, cuddling with the dogs is one of our great pleasures. I’m sure it’s just that they are easily chilled because they are so skinny, but they looooooove to snuggle up and we looooooove to let them. So the next few weeks will be challenging. At some point we’ll be able to invite them up on our terms, but for now we need to be pretty strict. I guess it’s like being a schoolteacher at the beginning of the school year. We need to start tough and then lighten up after we’re sure things are going our way. And it won’t be easy. I mean, look at this—could there be anything more precious?

But I know the rewards will be worth the struggle, so we’re going to stick with it. And in the meantime the dogs will need to deal with the fact that they’re no longer in charge around here. Now excuse me while I go look for a cough drop. Ahem.